I Never Forgot
by GottaBeJenny
Summary: Jenny left the Upper East Side after sleeping with Chuck. Or did she really sleep with him? What will happen when she comes back? Sure not everyone will welcome her with open arms.. //Angst. Family. Romance. Hurt/Comfort. Slightly Drama. NxJ; DxS; BxC //
1. Miles From Where You Are

She sighs once while she was sewing a dress in her new city of dreams, well at least she thought it was a dream, but it wasn't. It was more like a nightmare, because everyday she went outside and looked at all the people passing her by she just needed to think back to Manhattan, to the Upper East Side and how she just left everyone behind.. maybe for good, but it wasn't good for her. She couldn't get the people out of her mind, especially not him. She just left. She didn't see how she could fit in after all the things that happened. How could she do that? How could she lose her virginity to someone who's not worth it? To someone who didn't love her? How could she? She always wanted for it to be special, she always thought it would be with her prince.. But it was the devil she lost it to and she would never get it back. She couldn't deal with the hurt and disappointment in their faces, she couldn't take it. She needed someone who understood, who listened to her, but no one did. They all just judged her, without knowing anything for real. But she didn't deserve it any other way, did she? She really screwed up big time..

_**FLASHBACK**_

„Nate?", Jenny looked around the apartment, but no one seemed to be there, the lights were all out and silence filled every room. She sighed and made her way to the kitchen counter to pour herself a glass of water. She stood there, drinking and thinking about many things, in fact she didn't even know why she went here. She could have gone to Eric, but her foots took her where she was now, to Chuck and Nate's penthouse. She wanted to go as she finally heard some noise, then a light going on in the hallway. „Hello?", she asked while she made her way to see who was coming. She shook her head slightly as she saw Chuck coming inside. He must have been drinking, she could definitely tell by the way he walked and finally by the way he talked. His voice was slurry, even though it still had his special pronouncation in it, something Chuck Bass seemed to never lose.. „What pleasure! Waiting for Nathaniel, little J?", he asked her and she nodded her head slightly as he began to laugh. „You really think you have a chance with him, don't you?" She simply looked down to the floor and held back the answer she wanted to give him. To be honest, she actually just wanted to go. She didn't want to see Chuck anymore, so she gave him a nod and walked past him, but he held her back. „Come on, let's drink something to lost love, lost friendship, lost everything!" Jenny looked at him puzzled and wanted to refuse, but she couldn't. Did it matter if she sat alone at home or drank something with Chuck? No, it didn't. Her dad couldn't care less where she was, the same counted for her brother. So she gave him a nod and even smiled as she made her way back to the kitchen where she began to pour for Chuck and then herself various glasses of Scotch. It was nice, at least she wasn't alone. Jenny didn't want to be alone, she had enough from it. She wanted people around her, people who loved her – but no one seemed to do that, no one loved her, but she learnt to accept it. And she was happy, when she wasn't alone.. Jenny couldn't remember how much she drank, she couldn't remember how the evening took his end, but she remembered that she woke up alone in Chuck's bed, still feeling fingertips all over her skin..

_**FLASHBACK END**_

She closed her eyes and tried to forget what she just remembered again. But the memories were haunting her, every time she tried to sleep, every time she had nothing to do, every time she thought back to the Upper East Side.. And she didn't even know what happened for sure. She just left, she couldn't take their judgmental eyes anymore. Why didn't she ask what happened? Why did she make conclusions out of the blue? She hadn't just ruined her own life with that.. „Jenny? Are you okay?", she heard the voice of her mother slightly, forced herself to smile and nodded her head. „Yeah, I am.." She looked up at her mother and bit her lower lip slightly. „Do you.. Do you think that I could visit dad sometime soon? I really miss him.. and Dan.." Her mother stroke her cheek and sighed. „It's hard to be away from them, isn't it? I will call him and see if you can come.." Jenny thanked her mother who left right after it with the guarantee to call Rufus. Jenny on the other hand tried to concentrate on her new design again, but it didn't really work..


	2. Take Me Home To My Heart

**Thanks to **_**grrmeowrawrr**_** for my first review. Really, thanks. :) I'm glad you like it!**

„Welcome to Central Station", Jenny sighed as she heard this information. She struggled to get her suitcases out of the train, but rejected every help people wanted to give her. Somehow she had that feeling that she needed to make everything work by her own, because that was the only one she could count on after all. Herself. No one but herself. As she made her way out of the train station, she saw some people taking out her cell phones and making pictures of her. ‚Great.. I will be all over Gossip Girl again..' It was weird, but somehow she even missed it. In Hudson no one cared about society, fashion or gossip. It was a simple life, but.. yeah, it was a really nice life, too. It was not as complicated as it was here. There you could keep your secrets easily, because no one wanted to unravel them. It didn't matter, everyone lived their own life and actually everyone seemed to be happy about that. Jenny instead didn't care. It was great not to be all over a website for the past year, even though she found herself looking it up on the internet sometimes when she didn't know what to do or when she couldn't stop thinking about her ‚old' life, which was never going to be like it was before again. Even though she was back now, she wasn't here to stay. Jenny didn't even know if she wanted to live here ever again.. It had too much memories she wanted to forget, too much people she most likely never wanted to see again and on top of it all, here was the boy who broke her heart too many times. She shivered as she walked outside into the fresh air, even though she felt the need to smile when she saw all the busy people on the sidewalk and the full streets in the center of it all. For a few moments she just stood there and looked around, until she saw some kind of lightning, which made her come back to reality.

Jenny hurried to get inside a cab with all of her suitcases and extra-bags she brought with her just in case her visit would be longer than she thought it would be. Everything was possible, especially in this surroundings where she was now again. She heard her phone go off and saw the post on Gossip Girl.

Look who's coming back to the Elite.. We knew you couldn't live without us for a long time, Queen J. But be careful, the lights are turned red.. If you know what's good for yourself you better not cross the way of you-know-who..

She sighed and put her phone back into her pocket, mumbling „I'm not coming back for trouble..". That's how it was, she didn't come here to cause any trouble, she just wanted to know the truth and if she hadn't found out till she went home again, she could tell herself that she would have tried at least. That's not what she wanted, but she would need to live with it if that's the way things would end. She smiled when the cab stopped and she could see the familiar building she missed while she was away, she really did. Even though it had brought so many problems, it was still home.. not the home she was used to since childhood, but the home of her new life – or now old life again. It was weird, she had three different places whom she could call home, still she liked the one in Brooklyn the most. There she had her real family around here and things were good.. really good. She sighed and got out of the cab, giving the driver a tip for taking out her bags for her.

„Dad?", she called out when she got into the apartment and looked around for a sign of movement, but it didn't seem like that there's some life around. She just kept walking inside, leaving her bags next to the entrance. „Jenny!", someone called out after a while, she jumped slightly – really, she didn't think that someone was actually here – and then turned around to face whoever it was. „Eric!", she said smiling and walked towards him to hug him, but she frowned when she saw another person. „...And Nate. Hey!" She heard a quiet „You're back" from Nate. It wasn't a question, it was a statement, but she decided to nod her head anyways; she wanted to be nice. „Yeah, I just missed Dad and Dan... and everyone. It thought it would be nice to be around for a while again.." Eric smiled at her which made her smile, too, while Nate turned away and walked over to the exit. „I will go then, I guess you wanna be alone.. and do family stuff..", he left with a smiling nod and Jenny sighed. „Does he ...know?", she asked Eric with a serious expression and he made a face, but then he nodded and for Jenny it felt like the stones on her shoulder, which felt so light before, turned into rocks..

**Sorry for any spelling/grammar mistake I made. I'd love you forever if you reviewed! ****:)**


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